Warlocks Bicycle Club

Oooof!!

2008-07-21T14:57:00.002-06:00

Watchout for those street signs.

RedHotRiot2

2008-07-21T14:48:00.004-06:00

Race/fun by: AJ, Beer: PBR, Pics: P77

Viv' le Tour.

2008-07-16T13:45:00.003-06:00

So, I hope you all are catching the Tour where you can. At this point in the game Cadel Evans wears yellow by one second ahead of CSC's Frank Schlek. One Second! I really need to find a place where I can watch these stages WITH SOUND! Hyde Park Pub will show Tour coverage on VS. but try and get them to pump up the volume. We must UNITE!

Red Hot Riot Sunday, July 13th

2008-07-10T18:37:00.006-06:00

LOTS OF BEER, BIKE POLO AND RACES! I get nervous just thinking of racing down that narrow ass alley again. Last years event was crazy fun, this one could be even better.

Gettin' Randy at Rhodes

2008-07-10T18:34:00.002-06:00

Prestige is hosting a skate contest at Rhodes Skatepark this Saturday. Come down and watch some 4 wheel'n action.

Ahhh, Summering in Idaho.

2008-07-09T20:27:00.006-06:00

This pic was taken before the Independence Day weekend. Before I drove this bike into some motel in Klamath Falls, Oregon while looking for directions at six in the morning after driving all night following a ten hour work day. I know there is no excuse, but that's my excuse. The rigid fork was destroyed but I've since contacted Jerry at Hippie Tech Suspension and a custom fork is on the way. Suh-Weet!

-43

PDXcellent

2008-07-05T10:57:00.002-06:00

Well, as many of you know, yours truly has picked up and moved out west to take a position at Cyclone Bicycle Supply in Portland. Some are bummed, some have rejoiced. None the less, I jumped a bird with M39 and headed out on the first and started work the next day in the warehouse. Holy shit. The first day was insane. Picking orders and generally trying to figure out the chaos that is the warehouse was a little overwhelming. Add to that the fact that I didn't quite sleep the night before with anticipation and a touch of heart burn. Not to worry, though, I killed it like you all knew I could. The next night our hosts got married at Voodoo Doughnuts. It was a quaint ceremony attended by some of PDX's finest dirts. Most of which are the best messengers in town. Back to the house afterwards to chug on some Sangria and nosh on some tappas under a shower of fireworks and done was finally done. It only took two ceremonies, but Matt and Clair are now legally hitched, and we were lucky enough to be there for both. Sign the witness line and there you go. It will not come to any great surprise to any of you, but I forgot my software for my camera in Boise, so I'm not going to be able to load images to posts for a minute. Bear with me until then and use your minds eye to picture all of this. Thanks to all that showed up for polo last Sunday. What a good turnout, that for which there should be more of. Have no doubt that I'm going to be hitting it here with the Axles of Evil on their home court, aka "Little Beirut". I'll keep P77 and Four Three posted on the level of play and styles so when it's time some of you kids can come over and rep the 208 in either a tourney of just some pick ups. So, for now, I'm signing of with event envy. Have fun at the B&S, don't get murdered in the heat and chug a couple for me! C39 from PDX

Howzit work again?!

2008-07-03T17:26:00.002-06:00

It feels like an eternity since my computer died and I know it's been as long since I've posted on this lil blog log alog. I am now thoroughly proficient in all ways of the Boise Public Library System and hope to frequent this page a bit more often. The library is cool for a myriad of reasons, notably the creepy, smelly lurkers peering over shoulders and all the over-amped lil kids jammin' around demanding from anyone and everyone "HOW YOU PLAY THIS MOTORCYCLE GAME?!" On a more pertinent front - big race happenings for Saturday July 5th. Northstar Cycle Courier and the Boise Weekly are hosting the Third Annual Bars & Stripes alleycat, it starts at 7PM to accommodate all you bike shop monkeys so drop those nipple drivers and come get some! Registration is from 5:30 on at the Weekly offices on 6th & Broad and will set you back 13 bones ( you get a tee-shirt, free beer and some killer swag). Last Sunday the 208 Bike Polo held a heated showdown and bbq farewell for the C39's. Epic battles in 95 degree heat, wieners on the grill, wieners on the sidelines, wooden horse molestation, shotgunned cans of beer and plenty of circling out. Thanks to P86 for the new hot-weather hockey balls but most of all thanks to C39 for gettin' the whole local polo thing up and off the ground. We all talked about it forever and we are fortunate enough you took the initiative to wrangle all us idiots into it. I haven't enjoyed playing a game so much since I was a kid and I'm sure I can speak for everyone involved when I say thanks dude and good luck to you guys in Pot-land. Y'all know when and where we play so come back sometime and show us how they do it on the west side. My minutes are almost up and the kid next to me won't stop laughing at whatever dumb youtube shit he's watching so I'm rollin' out. P77, Collister Branch, Boise Public Library (U.S. and A!)

2008-06-15T14:20:00.006-06:00

Happy Fathers' Day to all of you Dads and soon to be Dads. Here's to you and the craziness that is having kids. Congratulations to Alejandro Valverde on winning the 60th Criterium du Dauphine Libere. The little fella will be battling Cadel Evans in July's Tour de France. Cadel kind of creeps me out for some reason. Is he wearing eyeliner?

It would be a fine battle between these three dudes if it weren't for Levi's(stars and stripesy) team being shut out from participating in this years epic. I would love for some wild card middle or heavy weight to take the yellow jersey into Paris.

Totally possible this year. Kim Kirchen? Totally.

Fabricide!

2008-06-11T22:30:00.007-06:00

Let me begin by saying sorry for the lack of fresh material here at the Warlocks' Chronicle. I know there is no excuse for a stale web log but 77's computer has sh*t the bed and he's also busy nesting. I (43) on the the other hand am just not very good at throwing down interesting posts that ooze with literary genius. That said I'm just going update y'all to what's happening in my crazy little universe.

First off, I am excited to inform you that I've gone ahead and, due to an increase in the limit of my personal credit card, have ordered the pinnacle of all bicycle frame jigs; The Anvil Journeyman frame fixture, which should arrive in roughly three weeks (give or take a week). If I can figure out how to miter my tubes without the use of a milling machine I will start by building my wife the ultimate in super Mom commuting, kid hauling, grocery-getting, mayhem. I will be designing this utilitarian super-machine with the aid of Bikecad-pro which I have also purchased. Yipee! I'm ready to get this whole bike building ball rolling.

Next up are the regular goings on in my ten by twenty foot shack that I call "my shop" in my back yard. I've been trying to make the ends meet by fabricating things out of steel out there. For instance I've just finished an entertainment center and end table for little "Ralphy" (this is an alias as to protect the innocent) of which I'll have pics of on the fledgeling blog I've just created to showcase some of my creations until I can launch a full blown website. I just have a few pics up for now but will be putting up some text and some photos of more previous works real soon. I also have some fab jobs coming up that will, undoubtedly, make it to the blog. Next up, D-Bag's contractor rack. Really.

In the world of cycling we're amidst the Dauphine' Libere which is good indicator of who's going to stir things up at Le Tour....well, minus levi Leipheimer and last years victor Alberto Contador who're banned from the Tour by association of their team Astana. I will, no doubt, be congratulating the winner of the Dauphine' right here real soon.

I must now finish my beer and retire to the shower. I will promise to try and keep the posts coming until reinforcements arrive. Good night campers.

fourthree

2008 Giro d'Italia

2008-06-01T10:27:00.004-06:00

The Warlocks Bicycle Club would like to congratulate Alberto Contador Velasco of Team Astana and winner of the 2007 Tour de France on winning the 91st Giro d'Italia. Hopefully he pees clean. For how it all went down check out Cycling News. There some really good photos on the site especially those of the Gavia.

2008-05-24T14:54:00.000-06:00

Cycling = pain.

Rec yer Bike

2008-05-12T14:19:00.005-06:00

Bart from the Bikes and Rec crew wrote to let us know they are hosting an alleycat (with FREE BEER) this Saturday the 17th. Do it to it. We'll be there and you should be too.

For details visit their blog (click).

Andrew Bird whistles well...

2008-05-07T17:15:00.002-06:00

I was rolling around downtown today when my wife called me. "Andrew Bird is coming to town!" Exciting news as he makes super good music with a variety of cool and weird instruments. I checked his myspace to see if the tour was posted and sure enough; he'll be here on July 21st with Josh Ritter. Andrew's music is haunting and pretty and odd and addictive. The video is an interview done while riding bikes around L.A. The guy points out that Andrew whistles really well (duh, his last name is BIRD!) and he attributes it to creating a "cavity in your mouth". Nice wordplay. Go buy his records and go see him live, you will not be disappointed.P77

R.I.P. in P.B.R.

2008-05-06T12:34:00.002-06:00

Since he lives in Chicago, I figured it'd be Old Style. Pabst is a superior swill anyway though. Speaking of the drinky drink: J Lee popped into the pub last nite with two ice cold bottles of Leinenkugels Original. Soooo good, and considering I had two bottles of directly imported Grain Belt last week my Midwestern beer fix is fully satisfied.

Dave is really good about forwarding me terrifying news blurbs from the web, this gem appeared in my inbox today: http://www.fresh99.com/bicycle-lift.htm His take was : Who do they think they are, Americans?! Seriously, how is it that something so stupid/lazy/cool didn't originate here? And Dave, if you don't get some flat pedals for polo soon, you're gonna need the bike lift to transport you home after the match.

Speaking of polo, it's high time we start up the Friday Night Fights don't you say? (I stole the name from A23 and his Oaktown cronies). It's light out late enough, let's git it on.

p77

No Coast Represent

2008-04-30T15:39:00.006-06:00

This time of year always makes me miss the Midwest, hockey playoffs, Twins baseball and bulk bags of Kingsford charcoal on sale. Minneapolis, despite being confined to the ridiculously cold climes of what is essentially Southern Canada, is an amazing town. It's a super liberal puddle of artists and cyclists and great rock n' roll in the middle of the cold and conservative sea of middle-American farm country. And everyone there likes beer. Lots of it. In tall cans, 40's, pony kegs, suitcases, half racks and now, I discover: pedal powered. My daily perusing of weird web culture (which always starts with Stevil's rants over at http://www.howtoavoidthebummerlife.com/weblog/ ) unearthed this little gem of awesomeness currently marauding the fine city streets of Minny. THE PEDAL PUB. WOW. http://www.pedalpub.com/ There truly is no place like home. P77

THE SWORD. NEUROLUX. 04.24.08. DO IT.

2008-04-23T12:10:00.001-06:00

Thought so...

2008-04-19T17:06:00.000-06:00

The Mean Streets of Sesame

2008-04-16T11:50:00.013-06:00

Riding in the downtown, weekend party traffic is always a bit interesting. Take my friend Bert for instance; he's the one in the car in the picture above. If the photo were larger you could read "Bert" on his plates and see he is giving me the finger and also, just barely, the police a few car lengths back. Ya see, Bert hates me or hates bicycles or hates traffic or hates driving or maybe even hates Ernie. Either way, he was so upset that I rolled past him while he was idling at a green light that he raced up onto my back wheel and laid on his horn for the next two blocks. I slowed to a crawl and laughed at him over my shoulder and then snapped the picture. About three seconds after I pulled the shutter the cop signaled me to the curb as he closed out my line. He reprimanded me for not having lights on my bike and explained how dangerous that really is. He told me the lighting fine was $50 and if he felt so inclined he could ring me up for an additional $75 for an unsignaled lane change and $75 for "antagonizing a motorist". He let me go with a warning and Bert I assume, went back to Mr. Hooper's and grabbed another pocket-bottle of gin before he went back out honking his little horn. So, be careful out there kiddies, Bert hates you and can't wait to tell you and everyone else within earshot all about it. *Local ordinance says that it's possible to be hit with a $100 fine for noise violation but fails to mention if this applies to car horns or muppets driving. P77

Pix - 04.12.08

2008-04-16T11:40:00.004-06:00

Gettin' the Snip and Paris-Roubaix

2008-04-12T17:46:00.007-06:00

So after fathering two beautiful girls over the past three and a half years I've decided to get a vasectomy. A brave and selfless decision I think. And smart as well, as I really think two kids are plenty for me and after I get the all clear my wife and I will be free to just let it go without concern. Totally.

After a sleepless night I got out of bed yesterday at 5:30a.m. and proceeded to shave my nuts for the procedure as instructed. Actually I shaved the whole enchilada. Stump AND nuggets. It's a difficult endeavor to do this so early in the morning after a sleepless night. So I get there and take one of two prescribed Valium while I wait to get my room and by the time we begin I've taken the other. During the whole deal I'm laying there with my pecker taped back and my shaved everything just chillin' out there as one male doctor, one female doctor and a female nurse perform the procedure. What they do is cut a small hole down there without a scalpel (some how) and pull out one tube at a time through the hole. They then take out a section of about 3-4mm of your man tubing, tie one side with what they call a purse string and burn the other side with what looks like a small soldering iron. The dude wanted to give me the thing but I forgot it there. That sucks 'cause I don't have a soldering iron at home. Damn.

Since the whole thing went down I've been popping vicodins, drinking crimson wheats and icing my stuff with a bag of frozen peas and basically holding the couch down. Not such a bad weekend if you ask me. Apart from having bruises on my swollen sack and the occasional feeling of having been kicked in the balls. I think the benefits will out weigh this short period if discomfort. It may be the pain killers an beer talking but I feel pretty happy right now. Now onto bikes. The Hell of the North, the Queen of the Classics, the 106th version of Paris-Roubaix happens tomorrow(Sunday) and I'm wearing my jazz hands. This is my favorite race on the calendar and the fact that the weather man is expecting rain just adds to the excitement. The riders with enough grit to tackle the 259.5 km (161.25 mi) trek to the velodrome in Roubaix will travel on sections of cobblestone roads that've been trodden by the armys of the Roman empire as well as those of of Napolean. This race has been conquered by such greats as Eddy Merckx (3 times), Roger De Vlaeminck (4 times) and Francesco Moser (3 times). The race will be broadcast NEXT Sunday, April 20th at 4p.m. EST on Versus. Check it out if you can. If you can record that shit, even better (Burn me a copy). I don't know why they're waiting a week to show the race. I bet if it was a cage match or a turkey shoot they'd have prompt coverage. Yeah, they can suck it! Maybe by then we can all agree on a spot to watch it and get together to make some beers disappear. Until then, adieu.

More Liverdance Photos.

2008-04-05T16:06:00.003-06:00

...and some more, even.

2008-04-05T15:54:00.004-06:00

MELVINS

2008-04-02T11:07:00.000-06:00

Big Fun

2008-03-29T16:04:00.002-06:00

San Francisco big wheel bombin. Wait for the cop at the end...too funny.

Bring Your Own Big Wheel 2008 from Scott Beale on Vimeo.